


Spoken Freely

by campsearchlight



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Alcohol, F/M, Joker has a crush and knows exactly that that’s what it is, Mutual Pining, Shepard has a crush but is totally unaware that that’s what it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29942559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/campsearchlight/pseuds/campsearchlight
Summary: A rare day off comes along, and joining Joker for a beer is totally harmless, right?
Relationships: Jeff "Joker" Moreau/Female Shepard
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	Spoken Freely

**Author's Note:**

> I started a new game of mass effect yesterday and... this happened. I love them too much already 😭

Downtime was such a rare commodity that Annie Shepard had no idea what to do with it. Currently, she had twenty-four hours and fifteen minutes all to herself. She stood in the center of her cabin aboard the _Normandy_ with her arms crossed over her chest, carefully weighing her options. 

They had just docked with the Citadel, which commenced said downtime. Most of the crew had scuttled off to chase whatever pleasures they could find on the station. She reckoned she was one of few who hadn’t quite literally jumped at the chance to leave the ship. 

There was Chora’s Den. Drinking amongst the crew would be... uncomfortable. She was not their peer—especially after her recent induction into the Spectre ranks. They wanted to cut loose, and they couldn’t really do that with their commander sitting _right there_. She didn’t want to put them, let alone herself, in that position. 

There was also the shooting range in C-Sec. Brushing up on proper handling of a pistol was always a good idea. But, she couldn’t help wanting a drink, either, and alcohol and guns did _not_ mix. 

The only other place she could think of that would allow her to have her drink was the arcade. Though, that was a nonstarter; she would die of mortification if any of the crew saw her there.

Now, she only had twenty-four hours and twelve minutes. She sighed and passed a hand over her face. She was certain that she had some beer tucked away in a fridge in the mess. She resigned herself to having a drink alone in her room before turning in early. 

Decision made, she traveled the short distance from her cabin to the mess. As she had predicted, the place was deserted. She ducked into the walk-in fridge, found the beer in a back corner, and took a bottle. 

When she came back out, she was not alone. 

Joker was coming down the last step of the stairs from the bridge. He stopped when he noticed her. Pressing his cane against his right leg, he gathered himself to attention and saluted her—incorrectly—with his left hand. “Commander.” 

Ignoring the transgression, Annie pulled open one of the utensil drawers in search of a bottle opener. “At ease, Joker.” 

He relaxed, coming further into the mess. He cocked his head to the side. “I didn’t know we had beer.” 

“ _We_ don’t. _I_ do.” 

“Oh, please excuse my assumption.” He paused, watching her for a moment. “Bottle opener’s in the third drawer from the right, boss.” 

“Oh.” She closed the drawer and reached for the one he indicated. The bottle opener was predictably pushed all the way to the back. “Thank you.” 

“No problem. But, uh... are you in a sharing mood, by any chance?” 

Annie turned to him. “Not going out, Lieutenant?” 

His left shoulder lifted in half a shrug. “Nah. They specifically mentioned dancing, and, well—needless to say, I’m not a good dancer.” 

She chuckled with a closed mouth. “Right. Well, I guess I can spare one, on one condition.” 

“That is?” 

“You have to swear not to tell anyone there’s beer in there.” 

Joker grinned as he maneuvered to sit at one of the tables. “Deal.” 

She popped the cap on the beer in her hand, placed it in front of Joker, and went to fetch another. When she came back, she moved to sit at an empty table. 

“What, do I smell or something?” he asked. 

She looked at him, and he smiled at her. The smile ebbed away the longer she didn’t say anything. 

Joker didn’t seem to have an air of stiff formality around her, like most of the crew did. The salute was fine. Expected, even. But his casualness afterward threw her off. 

“You... want me to sit with you?” she inquired, still staring at him. 

“I mean, you don’t _have_ to, but the option’s open.” He took a nonchalant sip of his beer. 

Annie never hesitated, so she found it strange that she did now. 

The bottle pressed to his lips, he glanced curiously at her, awaiting her decision. 

The worst that could happen, she figured, was they would sit in awkward silence for thirty minutes before parting ways. She joined him at his table. 

He was smiling again as she settled. Then, he tilted his beer bottle toward her. “Cheers?” 

Reluctantly, she clinked her bottle against his. 

They did end up sitting quietly for a while. Not very long, though, because Joker leaned an elbow on the table and rested his cheek against his palm. His eyes were unmistakably on her. “Permission to speak freely, Commander?” 

Annie snorted at that. “Since when do you ask permission for that?” 

“Good point. I’ll speak freely, then.” He rubbed his thumb absently over the crinkled label. “What do you do for fun?” 

She stared blankly at him. 

He shrunk back a little. “What?” 

“Are you joking?” 

“Though my name would suggest otherwise, no. Do you not have _fun_ , Commander?” 

“In case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t had time for fun lately.” 

Joker nodded, like he could ever understand. “So, if you had time, what would you be doing?” 

She hesitated again, then said, “I... I used to play a lot of video games. Before all this mess.”

Joker choked on his latest sip. “Seriously?” 

Her eyes narrowed. “What?” 

He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he laughed. “I never pictured you to be a gamer.” 

“Yeah, well...” She circled her wrist a few times, saying, “Something, something, escapism, something.” 

His laughter picked up a notch. 

Despite herself, Annie felt half a smile pull at her mouth. “Don’t tell anyone about that, either.” 

“Hey,” he said, lifting a finger from his bottle to point at her, “that wasn’t part of the deal.” 

“I hate to do this, but that’s an order, Lieutenant.” Her eyebrow arched in a challenge. 

Joker laughed again. It was a nice, raspy laugh. “Fine, fine. My lips are sealed.” 

“Good.” She caught her thumbnail on the edge of the label and started peeling it up. “What about you? What does the Alliance’s best helmsman do in his spare time?” 

“Oh, little ol’ me? I also play a lot of video games. And I mean, like, an _unhealthy_ amount.” 

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t poke fun.” 

“I’m not! I’m not. I’m dead serious.” 

“Geek,” she accused with a smirk. 

“Okay, wow. You’re absolutely one to talk, Annie.” 

They both froze, but the professional line had been crossed. Under no circumstances could they be on a first-name basis. 

“Er...” Looking away, Joker cleared his throat. “Commander.” 

Tense silence hung between them, and then Annie got up from the table. “I should... I’d better get some rest while I have the chance.” 

“Oh, uh, yeah. Good idea. I might—I might do the same.” He lifted his hand to scratch the back of his neck. 

She nodded once, and, bottle still in hand, marched back to her cabin. 

She cursed herself for sitting down with him, because the truth of the matter was that she _liked_ Joker. In another lifetime, she could see herself being good friends with him. For a plethora of reasons she couldn’t list at the moment, that simply couldn’t happen. 

She tossed back a gulp of her beer. She threw the half-empty bottle into the wastebasket next to her desk before throwing herself into her bunk. 

Stupid Joker. What gave him the right to make her feel like a person for the first time in months? 

She groaned quietly into her pillow—and then she went to retrieve her beer from the trash.


End file.
